Right-brain dominance as a marketable skill

I'm going to connect some widely-spaced dots, so hang with me.

Most people have heard of right-brain left brain. I won't go too far into the specifics this time (that probably gets its own post) but suffice it to say that its validity, implications, and application go FAR beyond its tongue-in-cheek pop psychology reputation. Right-brain dominant folks are known for their ability (and desire) to get at and see the big picture. This applies to any concept. They also excel at abstract thinking. In a game of compare-and-contrast, assessing an overall situation, and summing things up, they're the starring quarterback you want on your team.

Many people have heard of Family Guy. For the longest time, I was completely oblivious to its existence and it utterly shocked me to learn that it had existed since 1998, right about the same time as King of the Hill. Indeed, it had been relegated to some little show that piggybacked on the Simpsons, always being eclipsed in its shadow. But indeed, Family Guy holds its own. Within just a few years, it had attained a level of clout that took the Simpsons almost a decade to build. It did this by not only pushing the envelope but by shredding it, with politically incorrect statements and concepts, taboo situations, and making statements people probably unconsciously thought but had never been brought into consciousness. These folks don't just let it drop, either. They take it and run.

It occurred to me. Both my husband and I are fairly right-brain dominant; my dominance is noticeably excessive, where as his is more subtle. I have learned not to underestimate it, though. I make sweeping connections between widely different things, and he has this gift of vocab that lets him tell it exactly like it is. Mix that up with an extreme dry sense of humor and a knack for delivering the punch without missing a beat (and with a completely straight face) and you've got yourselves a team that probably COULD write material for Family Guy.

If we were any more consistent with our gifts, I think we'd have to go for it. But alas, we've chosen a different path. Nevertheless, certain instances pop up occasionally that still give us a good belly laugh.

My husband on tools:
Him: "I won't go into Sears for much of anything anymore."
Me: "Not even their tools."
Him: "Nahhh."
Me: "I thought Craftsman was awesome."
Him: "Well, if it's something like a wrench, that's OK. I mean, it's pretty tough to fuck up a wrench."

Me on The Count from Sesame Street:
"Ah, ha ha ha, one vibrating dildo! Today was brought to you by the letter 'x'. It's like a Porno Sesame Street!" (A total Family Guy-style see-it-through-the-full-distance moment.)

There were more but, as often happens with Right-brain excess, I can't remember them. If/As they come back to me, I'll edit this post.

Queen for a day

Recently, on a large social networking site, friend posted the question, "what would you do if you were President?"

As usual, a laundry list poured forth into my mind. Here's by no means a complete list...

#1 - Truth In Advertising
First and foremost, let's agree to say what we mean, mean what we say, and stop flat-out lying to the American public (and indeed the world). It starts with food - no more hiding harmful ingredients under innocent-sounding aliases (MSG), labeling ingredients by weight not volume (1%, 2% milk), leaving ingredients off labels altogether (anti-caking agents in spice mixes, or less than 2% of gluten-containing compounds in rice milk), or GMO foods, etc.

Another area that needs addressing is TV commercials - fine print crammed onto the bottom of the screen for all of 5 seconds, such that you'll never be able to read all of it even if you DO try to do so, drug commercials that need not list all side effects but rather point you to a website or phone number, or sugary cereals that talk about being part of a nutritious breakfast.

And then there are other things, too - hidden fees in everything from hotel rooms to phone bills, apartment complexes that only show you models before you sign a lease and move in, and Google search returns that don't actually contain the text you searched for.

#2 - Education Overhaul
It's time to bring back reading, writing, and arithmetic. It's also time to bring back citizenship, good sportsmanship, physical activity (gym class AND recess), and the arts. It's time to challenge our kids, teach them (and not just to a standardized yearly test), and not be afraid to fail them when they don't actually pass. It's time to toughen up, smarten up, and run a tighter ship.

It's time to pay teachers better, and employ more of them. How do we accomplish this? By cutting the number of administrator positions - we don't need 6 vice principals and 2 principals. We need 1 principal and maybe 1-2 VPs. It's time to actually require teachers to be able to use proper spelling and grammar (especially the English teachers, and this is a skill that is sorely and sadly lacking). It's time to require that teachers not only know their information inside and out, but actually know how to teach it as well.

It's time to cut out all of the forced diversity, warm fuzzy, artificial self-esteem pumping, and wasted time. It's time to de-emphasize sports and class/race warfare. Teaching global warming is wasted time because that's a theory only, with lots of contradicting evidence. Instead, let's bring back real, decent science courses, based on logic and proven fact. Let's bring back real history courses, covering both that of the world AND the US. Creative writing classes and contemporary literature have all gone out the window and it'd be beneficial to bring them back. I'd also love to see a good health class that was really relevant and effective. Something beyond the circulatory system, "just say no", and the USDA food pyramid, TYVM.

And why in the hell are we charging people to ride the freakin' bus? Abolish parents blocking entire lanes of busy streets to pick up their kids when they live less than a mile away. Kids can walk (Lord only knows today's obese kids need exercise). And if the bus is free again, they can ride it (gotta walk to the bus stop and back).

#3 - Restore American Jobs
I don't know what in the hell Congress/Bush/whoever did in 2001 to lift restrictions on the exportation of American jobs to other countries, but it's time to hit a big whopping "Undo" button. Between that and the looming threats of the catastrophe that is Obamacare, jobs have fled this country wholesale. And it hasn't boded well for those of us who live here.

I'd like to see deep tax cuts and instead, tax the crap out of businesses who have moved their operations elsewhere. As in, take away all their itemized write-offs. This will encourage people to buy domestic and employers to employ domestic, too. This will also start to solve the plethora of problems caused by Chinese products and diminish support for human rights violations and other unpleasant working conditions in China.

I'd also like to see the minimum wage be abolished. I know that's not a popular concept and when I was younger and less educated, I supported the hell out of a major minimum wage increase. My reasoning at the time was that you can't raise a family of 4 on 5 bucks an hour. But then, I got a clue. First, you're not ever SUPPOSED to raise a family on 5 bucks an hour and if you are, maybe you need to rethink the idea of having a family. Second, most people making 5 bucks an hour are NOT those trying to support a family, but rather, teenagers living at home, simply trying to pay for a car or some spending money when hanging out with friends, but who otherwise have all their basic needs met. It doesn't make sense to penalize small business because of some teenagers or unplanned parenthood.

#4 - Lose The Chemicals
Our society is SO full of chemicals it's not even funny. It's not like we're actually living any better through chemistry and in fact, the environment and our bodies are horribly suffering.

I'm talking about food. Organic cultivation is quite possible and even efficient. Natural bug repellents do exist. Natural cows can be raised, without antibiotics or growth hormones. It's not like factory farming is a whole lot cheaper: it's not. Vitamin E is just as good a food preservative as BHT and corn starch is just as good a de-moisturizer as wheat flour and is far less reactive.

I'm talking about cleaning supplies. Did you know that grapefruit seed extract and lemon essential oil are powerful disinfectants? They're also very concentrated. Put them in a spray bottle with some distilled water and presto - you have a better cleaning product that Windex. Or how about color-safe bleach? Did you know that hydrogen peroxide is a powerful antibacterial agent? It's even safe enough to gargle with. Vinegar, baking soda, and club soda all have their uses. Colloidal silver is powerful, too, as is tea tree oil. You don't need to buy into a ton of Soft Scrub or Pine-Sol. Sure, those make jobs easier, but natural is better and more healthy. Haley's Hints is a great book for many of these tips and tricks.

I'm also talking about beauty supplies. I found that when I ditched all the hairspray, mousse, frizz ease, and other products, my hair...didn't need as many products. Going natural left it less oily, flaky, gunky, and flat, and I found I could make it cooperate much easier. Those products don't actually give you much more shine or control. They don't really make your hair healthier. Really, they don't.

#5 - Ban Mercury
I don't know what this fixation is with Mercury in this nation, but it seems to be lurking everywhere you turn. The big 4 places are thermometers, high fructose corn syrup (yes, that cheap sweetener that's in EVERYTHING), vaccines, and those ugly coily fluorescent light bulbs. Ban them all. There are substitutes for all of them that perform better, cost less, and prove to be much safer. If we banned lead in 1978 fairly effectively, why not mercury? Mercury is even more of a health hazard than lead!

#6 - Bring Back The Gold Standard
Or something to secure and anchor our monetary system. Because otherwise it's going to float away by way of the dodo bird. Seriously. Many decent books have been written on this subject, fleshing out the idea that our economy is based on ever-increasing debt and inflation because our paper money system is no longer tethered to anything finite. Instead, paper money is only worth ANYTHING because the store down the street will accept it, and only on the premise that he is fairly confident that he can turn around and use it, trading it in for material items he needs. This is an incredibly fragile scenario. And with the government printing more by the ton to pay for its debts, all this means is that we're ALL going to pay--very dearly--at some point in the rapidly-approaching future.

#7 - End Animal Testing, Deter Crime
It's cruel and irrelevant, since animals are pretty different from humans. Instead, why not use the very most violent criminals in their place? Put shampoo into a rapist's eyes instead. Test that pre-market Vioxx not on a monkey, but on a serial killer. Two birds, one stone. I hardly see how that is cruel and unusual punishment. After all, these people took lives, either in whole or in part. They lost their rights when they did that and got convicted of it.

#8 - Cut Spending, Increase Revenue
It's time to start shifting cost burdens to where they are most appropriate. Health care deserves its own item (and a complete overhaul), so I won't discuss it further in this one, other than smokers and drinkers pay much, much more and are completely barred from any government-offered public option.

Let's stop subsidizing factory farmers. In fact, let's have them pay into a fund that then goes to subsidize organic farmers. (And let's tighten the definition of "organic", too.)

Let's stop subsidizing nonproducers (in the form of long-term welfare) and multinational corporations (in the form of corporate welfare).

And instead of subsidizing hybrid vehicles (in the form of tax credits or write-offs), how about large SUVs pay a toll (after all, they take up more of the road, pollute more of the air, and are typically used as little more than commuter vehicles, and for typically a single person)? Maybe we could actually get some roads built that way and maybe, just maybe, they'd actually be wide enough. Maybe a tax cut for people who live within a certain mile radius to work? It could work in the form of a deduction at tax time.

How about instead of lots of large taxes on utilities (especially broadband, cell phone, cable, etc) that we shift back to plans with finite amounts of minutes on them, even during the nights and weekends, and even between phones of the same carrier? If you make people pay for what they actually use, and then tax them reasonably according to that usage, rather than giving it all away for free after a certain time, that would make more sense.

#9 - Healthcare Overhaul
A couple things on this one. First, let's shift the mentality from self-irresponsiblity and don't-do-anything-until-it-becomes-a-problem to self-responsibility and preventive self-care. Second, fricking pay for it. Catastrophic insurance policies only, for those unthinkable situations that prove to be quite expensive, such as a major accident or major unpreventable illness. Let's actually start paying for our own care so that we are more motivated to take care of ourselves. So, no more government programs. Temporary programs only, for those who are on short-term assistance when they're down on their luck through no fault of their own.

Next, let's re-prioritize and re-allocate the system, spelling out what type of care should be used when. Drugs should not ever be used to manage diabetes type 2; diet and exercise do that just fine - in fact, when done properly, they do better than drugs. Allopathic care should really be used in emergencies only - dealing with a crisis, catastrophe, or extremely advanced disease, or some other immediate threat (such as a quite-pathogenic viral/bacterial infection), or perhaps some other emergency such as stroke, obstruction, bone fracture, cancer, etc.

But when considering most major chronic, degenerative conditions, or hormone imbalance, mysterious conditions like fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue, disciplines like Functional Medicine shine best. The other disciplines should take a few cues from Functional Medicine and order A LOT more testing and be more open minded and current on the most up-to-date research and information.

Typical alternative medicine (those that use natural methods but without testing) should only be employed when the patient has no ailments or complaints and thus just needs wellness care. Any time there is a symptom or problem, complete testing should be done first.

So, the first-line care in immediate/serious situations should be allopathic medicine. First-line care for all other internal disorders should be Functional Medicine. If Functional Medicine fails (usually unlikely), then an allopathic approach is warranted. First-line care for aches and pains should be chiropractic. First-line care for neurological problems (dizziness, incoordination, weakness, etc) should be neurological chiropractic or Functional Neurology. Only when those fail (or become more serious/immediate) should allopathic protocols be utilized. That is truly how healthcare should work.

And should insurance cover any of that? No. Why? Several reasons - 1) people don't value what they didn't pay for, so they're less likely to follow through or respect the doctor and his/her advice. 2) Insurance costs just increase the costs of care for everyone. 3) Since Functional Medicine is the initial approach to most issues, and it is quite reasonably priced (not cheap, but great bang for the buck), it's almost cheaper NOT to use insurance, and 4) for all crisis care, there are catastrophic insurance policies that work well.

#10 - Misc
I might consider other ideas, such as abolishing (or severely limiting) the stock market (multiple reasons), eliminating radiation (bringing back the regular cordless phone frequencies), eliminating that God-awful radio station compression or those God-awful blue-ish car headlights, or abolishing school zones but heavily ticketing inattentive driving, increasing chiropractic standards but then elevating chiropractic societal status and expanding their scope of practice, requiring newborns to be screened by a chiropractic doctor, legalizing edible marijuana (at least via licensed doctor prescription), outlawing cigarettes, legalizing concealed AND open carry for firearms (for all legal citizens with clean criminal backgrounds), abolish self-employed taxes, allow DCs to flat-out opt out of Medicare, tweak max subwoofer volume or frequencies, or ban them altogether, implement re-testing when renewing your driver's license (every 6 years), disband the cult of Scientology (at least revoke their tax-exempt status!), ban frivolous lawsuits and pin the cost back on the idiot who started it, abolish "fair use" doctrines, tax flipping houses and rental properties, and...

...Let Texas secede!

A year in the life...

I reckon I could launch into my stereotypical cliche, "oh my, has it really been a year?" but we all know that it has. Not that it seems like it. Not by a long shot.

The learning curve has a long, steep grade and I've pedaled my way to the top, huffing and puffing all the way, nursing my bruises and even earning a few spurs. The greatest mentors have echoed over and over again that how you practice a year in will be vastly different than how you started out, and how you practice 5 years in will be different, and how you practiced in 15 years will be worlds away from how you practiced at 5 or 10. And so on. I always took their word for it. Now I'm realizing how right they are. And I have the feeling that as we celebrate the anniversary of our first year in practice, we've only scratched the surface.

Because I'm me and I'm incorrigibly content with the way I am (at least in this arena), I feel the need to record a Year In Review of sorts for the cyberarchive - maybe someone else will see it and benefit and maybe not - if nothing else, it may help me remember our freshman roots someday. You never know.

I've discovered what a joy it is to care for people, to watch them get better before your eyes. They become calmer, happier, healthier-looking. The bags under their eyes disappear, their skin regains some color and youth, their step reclaims its bounce and symmetry. Sometimes missing hair grows back, sometimes a walking cane evaporates. People are happy and proud to share their new healthier eating habits, stress reduction techniques, blender or other cookware purchases, exercise regimens, Dr. Oz gems, and supportive shoes. They're jazzed to report that they've lost weight, discovered a recipe, sleep through the night, given up coffee, and gotten their energy back.

I've discovered that people will pick up on your underlying vibe and read you like a book, even if they don't actually realize they're doing it. Often without meaning to, they'll expose holes in your process, weaknesses in your presentation, wavering confidence, or uncertainty anywhere. They notice details - office cleanliness and decor, body language, vocal inflection. You've got to be aware of these and turn them into something you can use advantageously.

Sadly, I learned that the more you selflessly give, the less people appreciate you. You'd think it'd be the other way around, but it's not. You can tell someone you negotiated great rates with a lab to save them hundreds of dollars on blood testing. You can even tell them you'll offer these labs at your costs only, going through the trouble of ordering them and processing payment without any markup whatsoever (in stark contrast to every other medical office, which does mark up lab work--and handsomely) and they raise their eyebrows and smile and say, "wow, that's great!" But when it comes time to value your work and pay you for it, they suddenly forget that you're already hundreds of dollars cheaper than the guy across town offering a similar service, and even though you're always doing them favors, you hardly ever reap the fruits of your labor.

Also sadly, I learned that you've got to get tough with some people. Some rudely gab on their cell phones during their appointment time. It is indeed their scheduled spot and they can use that time as they wish. But if one of us is working with them, trying to accomplish a particular goal (for example, relieving a particular muscle spasm) during that visit, these distractions take time away from that. As a result, the goal can't be reached and there's a risk the patient will stop coming in, thinking they're not making the progress they should and blaming it on unproductive visits that somehow relate back to the doctor's/therapist's shortcoming.

You've got to get tough with other people, too. A cleanse means a cleanse. Gluten-free means gluten-free. Twice a week means twice a week; monthly visits means monthly visits. Ten o'clock means ten o'clock. Talk to your insurance company means exactly that, too. People try to bend rules, test boundaries, push limits, seek exceptions, and spot holes in your system. People don't mean to piss you off, they're just being them, not quite understanding the situation from our point of view. I don't expect them to. However, many of these House Rules are spelled out from the git-go in the paperwork and during the first few appointments; the rest would appear to be common sense that should hardly warrant any mention. However, many people don't read or care, and others forget. Many weren't paying attention in the first place.

It's OK to be a hard-ass. Don't be a prick about it, but don't be wishy-washy either. People can smell that like a fart in a car, so don't waver. You can shake in your boots on the inside, waiting for their reaction to something ("no gluten - ever", or "that'll be $1200") as long as you can do this without batting an eye yourself. Pretend their total will be $12 and say it like that. Pretend you're cutting tire rubber out of their diet when you say gluten. Practice makes perfect; with enough of it, you'll be able to tell people things that seem outrageous to you but if you do it right, people will respect you. It's like the hard-ass teacher that laid down the ground rules on the first day and nobody screwed off in his/her class. People moaned and groaned at first but they usually look back on that class as a great class and the teacher as a great teacher. Use that phenomenon to your advantage.

The first year (and probably more) of practice is spent figuring out 10,000 ways NOT to do something. I think that if you're not always changing something up or improving upon something, you're missing something or not putting in enough effort. I've realized it's smart to put off big purchases on equipment you're not sure about because you could be led down a path you didn't expect, and this path could take you far, far away from your original vision or plan. This isn't a bad thing - life happens. But money is finite, so spend wisely.

Which brings me to my next battlescar: all things finance and budget. If you start your own practice from scratch, you're going to blow through money. There are definitely ways to save here and there, and those can make a huge difference, cutting your investment in half (or even less) without sacrificing quality. Research really pays off here. It's crucial. Before stepping into or agreeing to anything, you've got to do your homework. Don't sign until you're comfortable. If you haven't researched, you're not comfortable like you think you are. Go look things up. Go make sure. Because money is finite, there isn't a whole lot of room for do-overs. And you can't press the undo button in most cases - what's done is done. If you messed up, you've got to chalk it up to expensive experience and move on. But make no mistake - you will probably financially free fall, if you're investing in a new endeavor without a stream of income. When writing the budget, don't forget to add in your living expenses - many people consider just the business expenses and go under because they've got to eat and pay rent, too. Don't make that mistake.

Trust is key. If people trust you, you've got everything. They'll follow your advice. They'll keep their appointments. They won't bitch about insurance. They'll feel good for coming. They'll feel like they're in the right place. They'll take their supplements. They'll comply with their diet changes, stretching, and exercises. And, they'll tell their friends. You may even get their families. Trust is fragile and priceless - don't break it.

It's OK to see some people go. Some bitch about Medicare. Others try to run your practice. Some bring a toxic vibe to the place. Others are just a plain headache. Some conveniently "forget" the rules. Some are really high maintenance. Try to understand them and have compassion - many of them have been through crap. Others have always drunk from the silver cup and can't be bothered to do anything for themselves. We've seen the whole spectrum already. I love them where they're at and I respect them and empathize with them, but that doesn't mean that our clinic is the right place for them. If they want to be here, we're more than happy to have them, as long as they respect the clinicians and our other patients and as long as they make the same commitment to themselves that we make to them. Those are really the only two requirements for being part of our practice - everything else falls under those two broad categories. It's not rocket science. Yet, it's beyond the capacity of some.

That's OK. It's OK if you're not able to get everybody better. It's OK if you can't please everyone. It's OK if some drop out of care for one reason or another. Learn from it what you can, chalk it up to experience, and move on. Don't beat yourself up over it; it may not be your mistake. Don't automatically assume it's the patient's fault either; maybe you missed something or got complacent. Don't allow dynamics to change and start treating longtime patients like friends. They're close, but they're still patients, not friends. Blurring those lines may feel more friendly and comfortable for you, like you're taking the relationship to the next level, but that might be confusing and maybe uncomfortable for the patient, so don't do it.

I'm surprised at how many people balk at a physical and paperwork packets. But then, that may be a subconscious shortcoming that my husband has to work through.

Last but not least, get out in the community, meet the average people, and show how YOU can help THEM. Get this - it's not about you. It's not about your clinic. It's not even about the chiropractic profession. Sure, you can attend a conference or health fair and when you do, as a Doctor of Chiropractic, you represent the chiropractic profession. You have an opportunity to make chiropractic look really good. But you do this by focusing on the prospective patient and making it about them. After all, they approached you because they have a problem or other need that they think you might be able to fill. Don't try to convert them to some fringe subluxation theory or attempt to indoctrinate them before they've even started care. Guess what? It's a turnoff and few will stick with you (something to the tune of the 6% of the population we currently see). Just talk about how you can help them. Do it in plain English, with simple explanations, using a lot of familiar analogies. Tell them something about their problem they haven't heard before. Help them understand. Don't hard sell. Let them know you exist; they'll come in when they're ready. When they come in, focus only on them. Not your upcoming fishing trip, not your electric bill, not your virus-infected computer. You're their for the patient, everything else is just details you can attend to later. The patient is the here-and-now, and you want to make sure not to screw up future here-and-now opportunities. This involves the trust I mentioned earlier. Trust is earned, and you build it through saying what you mean, offering options and recommendations, letting them choose, and then respecting their choice, whatever it may be. The last thing people want is another hard-sell, especially from someone they see as a doctor.

One gem I learned is that if you answer your own phone, make sure not to let on that you're a doc, but to pretend you're a receptionist. This works better if you're female, but males aren't out of the game. The reason I started going undercover is this: when people realize they're talking to the doctor, it's suddenly two things 1) a quest for EVERY question to get answered right then and there (and after the 20th, 50th phone call, this gets really old), and 2) it's personal - not only do they want to know everything you do but they almost act like you're the bad guy if you don't file their insurance. Contrast this to the impression that they're talking to the secretary. You can be as vague as you like because you're not the doc and you're not expected to have all the information. So this takes the pressure off because it's OK to misspeak or make other mistakes on the phone, and you're not having to defend yourself against probing questions or quests for free advice or quick fixes.

It has literally been a dream. It has gone by about as fast and it has felt about as surreal. It has been a lot of work - networking meetings, sitting through sales pitches, phone calls, free or pro-bono work, changing up procedures, gaining respect, and enduring growing pains.

Two of my mottos:
"You won't get good by being busy, but you'll get busy by being good"
- and -
"That's why they call it practice"

I wouldn't trade it for the world.

My husband on Catholicism

I burped.

I said excuse me.

My husband said, "you don't just get to launch something like that and erase it with a simple excuse me."

I said, "aw come on...it's like Catholics going to church on Sunday. Hop into a confessional and you're good to go."

He said, "maybe that's why people throughout the word adore Christianity...you spill your guts to the right man in the right box and you're off the hook."

I laughed. "'Right man in the right box?'"

He said, "well, the parking lot attendant doesn't cut it."

TL;DR... Verdict: It's all about who you talk to. Catholics have connections.