Stuff that is way better in Canada

To the more ignorant of us, Canada seems like that Little Country That Could, our benign neighbor to the north that does little and says even less. Kind of like a second America that we actually don't know anything about, except for maybe the fact that they say "eh" a lot and pronounce words like "out" and "about"....umm, differently.

The truth is, my fellow Americans, that we're totally missing out. Canada is like just another state and yet a completely different world all at the same time. Its economy doesn't just piggyback off of ours; they have their own that is separate and distinct. They have a subtly different set of customs and culture, one that is unique to them, and it's time it was exposed (at least, as much as one little-known blogger can do) and celebrated.

In my travels there throughout both childhood and so far as an adult, I've noticed some areas in which Canada not only matches but actually surpasses the States. Barely scratching the surface I've listed some of them off the top of my head here, in no particular order...

1. Tim Hortons. Hands down, do not pass go, go directly to Timmy's first thing in the morning. They have something for everyone; donuts, yogurt cups with fruit, muffins, bagels, sodas, smoothies, lattes, and of course, "Coffee-flavored coffee!" Not that I'm a coffee-drinker or anything, but I did fill up on my share of Boston Cremes (normally I'm not much for custard filling but this was *damn good* - I think the secret is a slight hint of butterscotch) and vanilla yogurt with raspberries and strawberries on top.

2. Smoke-free, child-free lounge sections. This is a recently new development, and it is a surprising one, given that it seems like everybody smokes in Canada. (Well, given their winters, that's almost all there is to do, besides watch hockey - that stereotype is true, and it's a sacred cow.) Imagine my pleasant surprise when, upon walking into a restaurant, the host(ess) instead of asking you "smoking or non?" says "table or lounge?" Hint: take the lounge, unless you want to run the risk of being disturbed by children. Canada is like the US in 1985 - there still is more than a shred of common decency left and parents still do live up to their title where childrearing is concerned, but you do have a fair share of American breeders living there and these days you just never know. So, you can now enjoy your dinner without being pestered by someone else's cute little angels without having to suffocate from the haze that tends to hang in the lounges of the States.

3. Radio stations. Even in the most remote, hick areas where the all-there-is-to-do-is-watch-hockey-on-satellite concept is an unavoidable reality, the radio stations are infinitely hipper than their counterparts in the most cosmopolitan metroplexes south of the border. Really. I had waaaay better luck with Saskatoon, Saskatchewan airwaves than I can ever find in Dallas-Ft Worth these days. Fewer commercials and less of that annoying and pointless signal compression are also happy bonuses. I actually read somewhere that the radio station programming is government-mandated to include a certain percentage of native Canadian music. This means that you get exposed to a lot of neat stuff that wouldn't see the light of day in the States, and I think Canada is intangibly richer for it.

4. Canadian music. So, not only do the radio stations play a greater variety than the monotonous playlists that perpetually repeat across American airwaves, but the music itself is also just plain...better. It has more heart, more soul, less processing, and less of a dollar sign motive. There is more variety, a sense of common-sense earthiness, and more of a genuine spirit. It's more organic and less fancy. You don't have to try to decipher layers of compressed, over-produced vocal tracks to figure out which is the real melody. The music is simple but not simplistic in that it does not insult one's intelligence like American pop has the tendency to do. The Tragically Hip is just one example of proof that there is subtle but profound genius lying under the surface of the seeming simplicity. Canada surpasses America's music talent in many instances. Just go to an outdoor Tea Party concert...you'll see what I mean.

5. Shopping. Not to be some co-opting locust consumer whose greatest goal in life is to spend every waking moment in a mall, and nor do I plan my vacation destinations by how their reviews stack up against each other in terms of their shopping potential, but I do notice a stark difference between Canadian and Stateside malls. I'm not exactly sure I can put my finger on it, but I'll do my best. I think it has to do with the individual stores themselves. Or maybe it's the low-key vibe, the NON-need to consume endlessly, but rather to shop when necessary for the things one truly needs. Canadians don't usually put on clicky high heels and designer clothes and make shopping at the mall a status symbol or a socially elite event. And they don't rudely smack into you with their SUV-sized strollers while gabbing on their cellphone (without so much as an apology to you but rather a borderline glare at you that it was your fault for being there in the first place) in the process. Maybe I'm way out of line and the charm of a Canadian mall is its lack of in-your-face scrolling advertising for medical group-clinics that provide elective services. I don't know. Whatever it is, I'll do my shopping up there.

Not that I'm some anti-American who is into bashing the country every chance I get, mind you. It's just that some things are truly better in other places and that the good ol' US of A isn't (and can't be) No #1 in everything all the time. I'm sure that I haven't done Canadians much justice, as I admit that it's been too long since I've been there for an extended stay and I'm too ignorant to be aware of some of the other great gems the country has to offer. But suffice it to say that it's more than just a big white land of nothingness with a Maple Leaf on its flag. That's just not what it's all a-boot...eh? ;)

the early worm gets the book

You asked for it! Here it is...

Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach. Look closely; I think the bird is actually symbolic of people like Jesus Christ.
One by Richard Bach. Talk about parallel universes and infinite possibilities!
Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach. If Jesus could talk today...question is, would any of us listen? Would any of us even recognize him? Or any other spiritual figure, for that matter?
The Book on the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are by Alan Watts. Really sums it up, concisely and brilliantly. Nothing is offensive, but nothing is sacred. The guy slams Santa Claus, for God's sake! LOL.
True Balance: A Commonsense Guide For Renewing Your Spirit by Sonia Choquette. Takes you through the chakras one by one, how to tell if the chakra is strong or weak, and what to do about it if it's not up to par.
Joining Hands & Hearts: Interfaith, Intercultural Wedding Celebrations--A Practical Guide For Couples by Susanna Stefanachi Macomb. If you want something other than a run-of-the-mill church wedding but you're not sure what else to do or where to turn for information, this is for you. Incorporate whichever elements you want, and as much or as little as you want; mix and match. We designed our entire wedding *custom* using this book - and we *still* get strong compliments on our ceremony well afterward!
Educated Heart by Nina McIntosh. A must-read for any massage therapist, reiki practitioner, or any other bodyworker. Even chiropractors and physical therapists would do well to read this, as some elements will apply to them. Remain compassionate and heart-to-heart while maintaining your separate and healthy boundaries.
The Way of Herbs by Michael Tierra. Interesting, easy read, and a crash course in herbs and nutritive therapy. Hippocrates said, let food be your medicine and let medicine be your food. A good building block for anyone interested in herbs and nutrition!
Ayurveda: A Life of Balance by Maya Tiwari. A fantastic book by a fantastic woman. She overcame her own terminal cancer and lives in full force today, cancer-free. Comprehensive guide on how to eat and live according to Ayurvedic standards. Doing this will enhance your health and clear up many of the chronic issues that plague us. Is is through this book that I cleared up my own eczema!
13th Gen: Abort, Retry, Ignore, Fail? by Neil Howe, William Strauss, R. J. Matson, and Ian Williams. For you later Gen X-ers, here's a lone sympathetic voice that can be heard through the din. For once, you can feel spoken to and identified with. Written in 1991, it came out when I was 13-14, but its relevance continues today.
What Color Is Your Parachute? A Practical Manual For Job-Hunters and Career-Changers by Richard N Bolles. While this book didn't directly help me choose my career, it has had lasting influence on its direction by encouraging me to tweak an existing job into a special niche that fits me better and creates more of a demand for my services and my vision.
Microserfs by Douglas Coupland. A Gen-X fiction book that is hilarious and well-written, something benign and nostalgic. It won't get your heart pumping or your adrenaline rushing, but it will keep you turning pages until well into the night. A good-natured book about a good-natured group that decides to leave safe and secure mediocrity for an unpaved but exciting life path--and all the twists and turns and evolutions that accompany it.
Daughters of Eve by Lois Duncan. Written primarily for adolescents, but still bestowes both nostalgia and genuine stimulation upon the adult. A bit freaky - not in a huge thriller kind of way, but once you really start to put yourself in the girls' situation!
You're Being Lied To by Russ Kick. A collection of various viewpoints from different analysts and op-ed writers regarding various subjects, mostly cover-ups and behind-the-scenes facts. This book is solely responsible for my decision to enter the field of natural healthcare; it got me interested in holistic therapy in the first place, and my natural instinct upon the discovery was to share it with the world. I can only wonder about the effects it can have on the lives of others.
The Eleventh Plague by John S Marr and John Baldwin. Yes, it could happen. Here's now...
Toxin by Robin Cook. So, you think managed health care is a good idea, do you? Bureaucracy is egalitarian and utopian, and it can do no wrong? And your meat supply is safe, right? So many, many inconvenient pesky questions...

This is just for starters; I'm sure there'll be more, so look for those funky "Part 2" posts!

Kitty Immortal

I have found the secret to immortality. It trumps the Fountain of Youth, oh yeah. Not even Groundhog Day or Neverending Story compare. Here it is: if you can survive the first 30 hours or so without sleeping, you probably never need to sleep again, as long as you also don't eat. Well, you can have a banana, a donut, a couple handfuls of potato chips, some yogurt, or a Dr. Pepper. What you have to stay away from are those bigger Standard American meals--you know, where you fill a plate.

After that, it becomes a piece of cake. Well, of course it helps to get a phone call from your sister around midnight to tell you that both of your parents have been seriously injured in a car wreck and are in a hospital version of a halfway house, something between a regular room and ICU. Running on pure adrenaline, we somehow managed to squeeze 3 full earth rotations into a single (albeit deranged) circadian rhythm.

The whole thing was rather surreal, really. One minute we were dosing off on the couch to a movie at home in steamy north Texas and in what seemed like a split second, we were driving in the sun across North Dakota and then through tiny little towns in southern Saskatchewan, where gas stations are literally a half hour apart. It's like it wasn't even real. Somewhere along the returning darkness, in the midst of radio stations with signal strength that ebbed and flowed with the hilly terrain, the internal bath of caffeine and adrenaline almost gave in, but then my body must've realized that I was going to do everything in my power to circumvent the normal biological rhythms, because eventually it said "screw it" and kept the adrenaline coming at a slow but steady drip.

We arrived after 22 hours of traveling. That was surreal, too. There is something simply wrong with the concept of your strong, adult, guiding role-model parents suddenly being reduced to frail semi-lifeless shadows of what they were a matter of hours ago. Suddenly the tables turn and it's your turn to take care of them. It can be disturbing to see them so...vulnerable. In such great need.

And then we find out that the person who hit them was an older guy, and that he walked away from the accident. Well good for him. His family doesn't have to change their plans on a dime. They don't have to worry intensely about the health and stability of the two people they love the most. They don't have to miss school or arrange for someone else to care for their patients at the public clinic. They don't have to run an endocrine glandular marathon, remaining awake for 67 hours straight, or work themselves into mental pretzels trying to learn a screwed-up healthcare system that makes no sense and then try to make significant decisions with such scanty information. Why is it that we protect those who no longer deserve the privilege of driving just so that they can haul off and with a single miscalculation, hurl a family into such turmoil and trauma?

Yesterday morning was brutal; we made our way down the dark quiet hallway, only the hissing, whirring, and beeping of all the various machines masking our footsteps. We peeked in and found them, miss-the-mark Chinese recreations of what they were supposed to look like. Lifeless, motionless, and unconscious. I actually felt faint when I saw each of them. I got a little nauseous, so I bent forward at the waist. I was so glad they were fuzzy and asleep; I wouldn't have wanted either of them to see that I wasn't strong.

Things improved drastically throughout the day, and that offered us a lot of relief. There was strength from then on. Already, the day was brighter. The situation didn't look so heavy. They started talking, lucid and coherent. Their vital signs gradually improved.

I continue to be amazed at the capabilities and mechanisms of the human body. Whether it's to stay up for 67 consecutive hours and remain surprisingly functional, or to heal itself miraculously, even if only given half the chance. We haven't yet mastered eternal life, but who knows--at this rate, we just might get there in my lifetime.